Thursday, July 22, 2010

strange dream

two boys (whose names i won't mention) came to my house one day. apparently legos have taken absurdity to a new level: they legofied starcraft units. weird.

anyway. these two boys wanted to play lego starcraft during their visit to my house for reasons unknown. each lego unit is roughly the size of a book, and someone had the bright idea to stake them down into the wooden floor in my family room. they did it before i came downstairs and saw them.

and my reaction is something like.. "WHAT THE HECK??" these floors now have GIANT HOLES in them! and exaggeratedly large too, for some odd reason. each hole was large enough to stick a thick pole into. but my parents were chill about it. one of the holes was actually much larger than all the others; upon further inspection, it led into a large underground basement that none of us except my father knew about. we had no idea what was down there, so we didn't pursue any further, understanding that our house had extremely complex systems that could literally kill you.

for example, my attic is still being explored. after discovering the entrance, my father and i would make periodic voyages though the complex tunnel systems that lead to unknown places. there are many forks--and over the years, we have tried to map it out as we go. the farthest voyage we have taken lasted three hours before finally turning back.

in each of my return trips (often on my own), i have never discovered an exit. i would sometimes hear strange noises; at times like these, i would hide, unsure of what may be coming my direction. i thought that maybe they were explorers like me, but i have never seen them.

so anyway, we were rather unsure of what to do with the basement so we left it alone. i took note that i would explore it sometime later. we decided to take our game outside into our exercise court. there was a giant chess set available there (though oddly, i only counted a single pawn on both sides), and so we just used those as starcraft unit substitutes.

Sunday, July 18, 2010

fights

i think i know why i'm able to be so heartless as to pursue and kill an argument despite being so sensitive now. it must be because of my mother.

my dad and my sister both say i have my mom's favor. well, i say not really. i've just closed up my heart so much after so many years of arguments that i honestly don't care if she gets mad at me anymore. it used to be that she would yell at me and i would feel bad, but it's not really that way now at nineteen years old. she can yell all she wants now, and i just won't care cause i've learned that it's impossible to win. there are only two options: either submit and let her think she's right, or keep yelling back until she stops. both my sister and my father are afraid of her, so they let her do whatever she wants, but i'm different. i let her get mad at me cause she's going to give me whatever the max sentence is anyway, but i don't let her win. i don't give up cause somebody's got to let her know that she can't control everything just because she's the big boss.

just for reference, one time she came into my room while i was sleeping, woke me up and yelled at me and told me to go to sleep. i was only half-awake when it happened, and then i went back to sleep. yeah that was weird.